Groovy Mama

Veggie Baby

2012-03-12T13:12:00.000-07:00

After doing some research, I decided to hold off on introducing meat and poultry to Babydoll until she was about a year old and/or had more teeth. The very idea of pureed meat makes me gag, not to mention that the smell of it is disgusting. I want the babe to enjoy food, not be repulsed by it, and I figure that if she sees Mama vomiting over her dinner, it probably won't elicit a very healthy response to what's being served.

Bleh. I am still shuddering over the thought of pureed meat.

Between 12 months and 14 months, we introduced turkey (in the form of meatballs), chicken and ground beef. She's definitely not into the beef. That's cool with me - we don't eat it very often, anyway. Chicken has been hit-or-miss, and that's okay with me, too (I don't really care for the bird). I cut up the turkey meatballs to put in her pasta-veggie lunch combo. Sometimes she gets down on it, other times, the dogs get a super yummy snack.

If my baby is naturally inclined to be a vegetarian, I'm all for it! My only concern is that she gets enough protein and iron in her daily diet. She drinks cow's milk like a champ, and she loves yogurt and cheese. While these are good sources of protein, I know that a growing toddler needs around 15 grams of protein per day and 10mg of iron. I've started looking into non-meat sources of iron and have come up with the following foods (that I know she'll eat):

lentils
quinoa
spinach
beans (kidney, pinto, black)
chickpeas (aka garbanzo beans)
potatoes (with skin)

Fortunately for us, this kid LOVES quinoa. Not only is it a good source of iron, but it's a pretty kick-ass protein, as well. We don't love cleaning it up off the floors after dinner time...nor out of her hair. Man, that stuff sticks like crazy to baby hair! She also loves lentils. Yay! Lentils are a staple at the Groovy Homestead - we eat them about once a week. Trader Joe's sells a 1 pound bag of steamed black lentils that are so yummy and super easy to add to almost any meal.

I should mention that soy is a good source of both iron and protein, but we don't do soy. After corn, it's the most genetically-modified food in America. And it wreaks havoc on women with polycystic ovarian syndrome (that would be me). Soy in small amounts is very healthy, but most people tend to eat/drink far more soy than is healthy for your body. Ah, but that's a post for another day.

Plan B

2012-02-23T18:03:00.000-08:00

So...you know how when you're a first-time parent, and you're staring down at your perfect, sleeping newborn, and you have all these ideas about how you're going to raise this baby, and you craft your plan? Yeah. In Babydoll's first year of life, pretty much nothing went according to plan. It was a good lesson for me - I am a chronic planner and I tend to get a little, um...perturbed...when my plan goes askew.

Plan A: have a totally natural, vaginal birth with no medical interventions

Plan B: induce labor at 36 weeks and have an emergency c-section

Plan A: breastfeed for a year or longer

Plan B: feed organic formula from 3 weeks on

Plan A: bedshare until baby wants her own bed

Plan B: baby wanted her own bed at 11 months (while I love her growing independence, I deeply miss having her next to me every night)

Plan A: cloth-diaper full-time

Plan B: cloth-diaper part time (BD jumped off the CD train just as soon as he'd jumped on...and now the little stinker soaks through every cloth diaper/insert combo out there overnight)

Plan A: personally make every bit of food that goes in the baby's mouth

Plan B: the occasional pouch of organic baby food makes life easier

Plan A: buy only produce that is organic and in season

Plan B: if your 13-month-old will only eat strawberries, buy strawberries in February

Well...they're organic, at least

Plan A: don't worry so much

Plan B: yeah, right.

And that was just the first year! But, like I said, it's been a very good lesson in going with the flow. Slowing down and enjoying it...every bit of it. Some things have stayed on course, like her alternative vaccination schedule, organic foods only, babywearing (yep, even still and at 20 pounds, Babydoll and I both love it), and never ever letting her Cry It Out. I've learned that it's the core of our parenting beliefs that is most important - respecting the child, loving her, guiding her, showing affection freely. The rest of it is just...stuff, I guess? I can't think of a better word. Just stuff.

By the way, I *planned* to finish this post while Babydoll was having her nap this morning. Plan B: Babydoll wakes up less than 20 minutes after going down, then proceeds to have a clingy, hold-me, put-me-down, hold-me kind of day.

I really just gotta quit planning. I may need a support group for that.

The Cow Goes Moo

2012-01-17T16:39:00.000-08:00

Holy crap. It's the middle of January already? Where the hell have I been???

Busy, that's where.

Between Halloween and Thanksgiving, I had pneumonia. WTF. I *never* get sick, ever, but I managed to come down with pneumonia and it knocked me on my ass for six weeks.

Then, we had the blur of my niece's birthday, Christmas parties, my dad's birthday, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, all culminating in Babydoll's 1st Birthday three days after Christmas.

Tears. I still can't believe my teeny tiny baby is already an entire year old. She survived. We survived.

Whew.

With the first birthday came the transition to cow's milk. After her 12 month well check, her kick-ass pediatrician gave us the go-ahead to start giving her cow's milk. Some of the sweetest words I've ever heard: "Don't buy any more formula." You got it, doc! I will be extremely happy to stop spending $150 a month on formula.

We already knew the kid would be getting organic whole milk. We (read: I) started reading and talking to other parents about the best way to transition from bottle to sippy cup. We (read: I) bought a few different kinds of sippy cups, because everyone said you had to have one special cup that was just for milk. You had to make a big deal about that one special cup, so the kid would know that milk-time was super-duper special.

Babydoll, in essence, said "Screw this special cup" by way of flinging it across the room. She's got an amazing arm, by the way. Also, "no-leak" is false advertising. Either that, or my child has got mad skills.

It comes down to this: she doesn't need a special cup, or a big to-do, in order to start drinking milk and stop the bottle. When we started the transition, she was getting three 5 oz bottles and one 8 oz bottle of formula every day, in addition to solid foods and her sippy of water. We cut out one bottle altogether, right from the get-go. No issues. We started mixing 3/4 formula to 1/4 milk for a few days, then went to half-and-half. No issues. We cut out another bottle and started giving her a sippy of milk to enjoy after breakfast and throughout the day. No issues. She seems to really like the milk in her cup. But when nap time and bedtime hit, then we've got issues.

We've both relied on the bottle to help Little Miss Crankypants chill out when it's time to go to sleep. Through the course of a week, we've managed to *mostly* get away from the nap time bottles. Bedtime is still a challenge. We're working on it. I know she doesn't have to be completely off the bottle, like, immediately, but it would be nice to be able to put all the bottles, collars and nipples away for good.

But hey, the kid hasn't had a pacifier in almost a month now. YES. We won't have the six-year-old still sucking on a binky at the grocery store. YES!

A Greener Christmas

2011-11-30T14:09:00.000-08:00

I love Christmas. I love the trees, the lights, the excitement, the chocolate. It is, undoubtedly, my very favorite holiday ever. I don't love the commercialism and materialism that the season brings with it. The line of screaming children and haggard parents to see Santa at the mall, usually 100 deep, has driven me crazy for years (which is why I am so very grateful that our family photographer, Mandy, had the acumen to schedule Santa photos in her studio by individual family sessions. Nightmare avoided!). The thrashing of stores, and my innate OCD need to tidy up when shopping, keeps me purchasing online. The general attitude of people shopping at this time of year is truly horrific - even the Salvation Army Santas are grumpy butts, I've noticed. Everyone needs some spiked eggnog and a healthy dose of "chill the f out."

This is Babydoll's first Christmas, and I've taken this as an opportunity to find as many ways to green it up as we can. Because the stinkerbutt is into everything now, we've decided to go with a live, tabletop tree this year. When Christmas is over, we'll plant the tree in our backyard. Hopefully, we will manage not to kill it.

The same gift bags have been circulating in my family for years. I decided to take the green factor to the next level this year, and we'll be wrapping every one's presents in reusable shopping bags, like these from Envirosax. Even the kids are getting their own. No more tissue paper, and to secure the bags, I'm using ribbon remnants from crafts and presents I've received in years past.

I love getting, and giving, consumables. Wine, coffee, oils, spices, chocolate, are all awesome gifts, especially when tailored to the recipient. My dad is perfectly content with a bottle (or two...or six) of Riesling. My mom is a Pinot Noir junkie. My sister-in-law and I share the same passion for quality chocolate, so even though she's pregnant this year and I can't give her a bottle of Pinot Blanc like I normally do, there's no shortage of presents that will make her happy. My two brothers are both easy to please - liquor and beer (um, I swear, we are not a family of alcoholics. We just enjoy adult beverages...a lot).

Shopping for Babydoll has been pretty easy. We don't want her to have a plethora of crap strewn all over the house, so her presents will be minimal. A couple Melissa & Doug toys, some books, new BabyLegs, and her big present: a grow-with-me Fisher-Price rocker-tricycle thingie.

For many years, I've skipped the "just because" presents for neighbors, co-workers, acquaintances, etc. Generally, these are people you only want to spend $5 on, right? So instead of spending, say, $50 on random folks, why not donate that money to your local food bank? What to do with the guilt that accompanies a gift from these people? Squelch it. Thank the person for their generosity, then explain your donation. Maybe they'll do the same next year.

I love receiving and displaying Christmas cards - I especially love when a personal note and/or photo is enclosed. It does go against my hippie nature, the amount of paper used to produce the cards, BUT they can always be recycled, right?

Christmas, or Hanukkah, or Kwanzaa, or whatever you celebrate, is a great time to gift reusable items to your friends and family. Water bottles, reusable shopping bags, cloth napkins, kitchen towels and other household items, are almost always appreciated, and are often things that the recipient may not purchase for themselves (steel and aluminum water bottles tend to be pricey).

Most importantly, at Christmas and always, is being able to spend time with family and friends - happy memories are priceless.

Did I really say that? Good lord. How about a glass of wine to serve with that cheese?

The IBS Invasion

2011-11-16T16:06:00.000-08:00

Last week, BD had a long overdue colonoscopy and endoscopy. As I'd suspected, the doctor diagnosed him with Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Game over.

After the diagnosis, I immediately consulted Dr. Google. And my mom, who was my Google long before Google existed. Medications don't really help the symptoms of IBS, so I knew we'd have to shake up our diet. And, gasp, start exercising. We are lazy people. If laying around on the couch burned calories, we'd be stick figures.

The exercising part, I don't see as too much of a challenge. Little Babydoll is becoming quite the active monkey and will probably be tearing up the house any minute now. Cooler weather has finally hit our desert town, making it easier to actually go outside and do stuff. BD tuned up our bikes a couple weeks ago. There is a park within five minutes' walking distance of our house. There is no good excuse why we can't get off our lazy asses and start burning some calories.

I bet you a million dollars we'll find a good excuse.

Back to the diet. Ugh. "Diet." If that's not a four-letter word, I don't know what is. Let's not use that ugly, ugly word. We'll say "eating plan," instead. I thought we were doing pretty well: we eat mostly organic foods and only grass-fed beef. I should clarify: this is how we eat when I cook. When left to his own devices, BD chows down on pre-packaged meals, Apple Jacks, hot dogs...you get the picture. After examining the "what not to eat" lists I found online, I discovered that for my part, I only need to tweak a few things (less fat, mainly) and I just need to make sure there are more options for him at lunch time. Lunch seems to be his downfall.

The biggest obstacle he'll have to overcome is milk consumption. He can easily go through four gallons of milk in a week. Seriously. We should have just bought our own dairy cow. But since D-Day, he's already cut way back. Progress! Next up, cheese. We are cheesy people. Nothing brings a smile to BD's face like a wedge of Brie and a sliced baguette. It seems our suppers of cheese, bread, salami, fruit and wine are in the past, or, at the very least, will become much more infrequent. Sad face.

Next up: fiber. Lots and lots of fiber. Easy enough. I'm a label-reader anyway, and I'm always checking the fiber content of cereal, pasta, bread, etc. Lentils are already one of our staples, and I've been looking up new recipes to use them. My current favorite use is a lentil soup with kale, carrots, and chicken Andouille.

Sugar. He's not much of a sweets-eater, but if you're a label-reader like I am, you know that sugar is hidden everywhere. Cutting back on the milk should definitely help in that department.

Artificial sweeteners. Here's the hurdle. He loves Sweet 'n' Low. I know. I KNOW.

Caffeine. Not much of an issue - BD doesn't chug coffee and tea the way I do.

Water. This is a foreign word to him. If given the choice between water and expired milk, I bet he'd choose the expired milk.

Probiotics. We started giving Babydoll Country Life MaxiBaby powder in her yogurt every day to help with her eczema (yes, it's working), and I'd been thinking for awhile that we probably ought to take some, too. Done and done.

We can do this. If I can keep him out of the Apple Jacks...

Attachment Parenting 101

2011-10-05T14:29:00.000-07:00

Here at The Groovy Homestead, we practice attachment parenting. What's that, you ask? In a nutshell, we nurture the shit out of our baby. More specifically, we do the following:

Bedshare. Babydoll is the ripe old age of 9 months (excuse me? When the hell did that happen? She was just born, like a week ago!), and she has slept securely between her daddy and me since she was 3 weeks old (when we transitioned to the bed from the couch, where we'd been sleeping - that term is used loosely - after my c-section). Bedsharing, or co-sleeping, works so well for our family. Babydoll is a restless sleeper (takes after her daddy). When she rustles at night, we can quickly soothe her before she fully wakes. And because I work days, during the majority of her waking hours, bedsharing gives us a chance to connect even while snoozing.
Bottle nursing. I still can't fully open up about my breastfeeding woes, without suffering another minor breakdown, so I'll only say that when we feed Babydoll her bottle, we do it in a manner that mimics breastfeeding. She is cuddled; eye contact is made and held; she is spoken or sung to. When she's hungry, we feed her. When she's full, we stop. There's no feeding schedule for this kid.
Babywearing. This is easily one of my favorite things EVER. I really look forward to wearing my baby whenever I get the chance. She loves it, too. When she sees me put on one of our many carriers, she giggles, kicks her legs, and gets all squirmy. When I place her inside, she rests her head against my chest and sighs. I think it's her happy place. It's definitely mine.
Sensitivity. Yes. Sensitivity. We view our child as another human, no matter how small she is. We are receptive and responsive to her emotions (oh yeah...total hippie parenting). She is never left to cry it out (those are very bad words in our house). We understand that when she cries, she is communicating a need to us. Sensitive parenting leads to sensitive children. We hope that as she grows, she'll be empathetic and caring, that she'll stick up for the underdog and never turn a blind eye to someone in need.
Practice balance. To be honest, this is still in the works. Babydoll's Daddy and I have only very recently begun making time for each other as a couple and for ourselves as individuals. BD has joined a weekly poker game so he's able to get out of the house on a regular basis, and we finally had a successful baby-free date last week. Dinner AND a movie! It was so nice to spend one-on-one time together...truth be told, we mostly talked about the miracle that is our child. Baby steps, right?

Babydoll got to spend an hour with me at work this week - Daddy had a last-minute doctor's appointment. She happily chilled in my office, and when I had to take a phone call in another office, she didn't freak out or cry for the 2 minutes I was gone. A co-worker noticed and commented about it. I explained to her that we practice attachment parenting and at her age, she knows that even if she's left alone for a moment, someone is always coming back for her.

Always.

The Center Of My Universe

2011-09-26T14:48:00.000-07:00

A co-worker and I often swap kid stories - his is a rambunctious eight-year-old boy, mine a spunky, newly-mischievous eight-month-old girl. He and his wife are older parents (even older than BD and me!), and I love hearing his take on things. A recent exchange:

CW: "You can't treat the kid like she's the center of the universe."

GM: "Why not?"

CW: "You'll spoil her."

GM: "But she's the center of MY universe. I think it's okay to treat her as such."

CW: "Hmmmm."

And that's the truth - Babydoll is absolutely, 100% the center of my and BD's world. Everything we do revolves around her. I go to work every day, even though I hate it most days, to provide a nice home and lifestyle for her. BD stays home, occasionally going stir-crazy, to care for her. She is with one, or both, of us 99.9%* of the time. And we like it that way. She's our child. We like her. We like spending time with her. She's fun to hang out with (I am fully aware of the poor grammar there. I'm okay with it). Maybe that will change in ten years, or whenever this "tween" business begins

Side note: is "tween" the same thing as "pre-teen?"

Anyway. The following morning, another exchange between Co-Worker and me:

CW: "Hey, you know what?"

GM: "Monkey butt?"

CW: "I told the wife what you said about the kid being the center of your universe, and she said that I'm full of shit because CWK (co-worker's kid) is most definitely the center of our world, too. Thought I'd let you know."

GM: "Right on. So, are you going to make a fresh pot of coffee? You took the last cup."

Seriously, what's the "tween" thing about? Is it all Hannah Montana and Bratz dolls?

* Babydoll was left in the care of my parents one evening when her daddy and I decided to go out on a baby-free date. It was disastrous. We picked her up two hours after dropping her off. We keep saying we'll try again. That was a couple months ago. Maybe next year.

Toxic Shock

2011-09-15T14:06:00.000-07:00

I've spent a lot of time in the last year researching how to rid our home of toxins and implementing greener, non-toxic ways to live. I spent so much time doing that for my home, for my family, that I neglected to get rid of that which causes more damage than anything else.

Toxic people.

You know these people. They undermine your happiness, your confidence, your overall well-being, on a regular basis. You keep them around because "She wasn't always like that," or "I've known him for X amount of time," or "But they're family." Guilt plays a huge factor in it, I think. You don't have to have been raised Catholic to know the inherent power of guilt. As a mother, I am wracked with it. While I can't shake off the Mother's Guilt (and probably never will), I recently made the decision to to flush that extra toxic guilt down the toilet. Buh-bye.

There's also the ongoing drama involved when toxic people are allowed to pervade your life. It's drama that sucks you in and perpetuates until you're finally able to say "Screw you. Get out." And when that drama finally clears out, the first breath of fresh, clean, non-toxic air you draw into your lungs feels like the sweetest breath ever. Your shoulders relax. Your mind slows down. YOU slow down.

It's freakin' awesome.

It's probably one of the more difficult challenges I've faced in recent years, getting the toxic people out of my life. Hurtful things were said, accusations were flung, tears were shed. And then it was done. Over. Never to be re-visited. The next morning, I felt as though I had slept better. I truly felt lighter. I was in a better mood than I'd been in for a long time. I realized just how much I'd been in need of that kind of cleaning. That realization also helped me see how much those toxins were affecting my relationship with my family and my attitude at home. It's my fault that I let it go on as long as it did, that I didn't squelch that shit immediately.

Ah. More guilt.

Groovy Book Review!

2011-09-12T21:24:00.000-07:00

I've been reading to Babydoll since she was in utero; she's now eight months old and fascinated by the pictures, the rhythms and tones of my voice as I recite to her, and I occasionally kid myself that she's actually following the story.

I was starting to toy with the idea of reviewing children's books, here and there, when I was contacted by an author whose book had just been published, asking if I would read it and post a review. "Yeah, dude! Hell yeah!" I believe my answer may have been a bit more professional than that, but you get the idea. I was excited then, and now having read and shared the book with my daughter, I'm really excited to share it with you.

CANDY STORE AT THE EDGE OF THE GALAXY

Aleza Freeman and Howard Freeman

The book is a collection of "poems and drawings for kids and the kid @ heart." The poems are funny. Really, really funny. They are clever, playful, and a few of them border on flat-out silly, which is exactly what children's poems should be. The pictures ("doodles") are bright, amusing, and definitely hold Babydoll's interest. Her personal favorite, now that we've read the book several times, seems to be "Fish Food:"

She runs her hands over the doodles for "Fish Food" while screeching,

which translates to "Mama, this is sooooooo freaking awesome!"

Groovy Mama's favorite poem is titled "Alphabetland." Here is an excerpt:

"There once was a day when W met E.

They joined together and formed a WE.

Their love grew stronger as time passed by

and they became F-A-M-I-L-Y."

Yeah. Awwww. Overall, the twelve poems in the collection, and their accompanying doodles, passed the Babydoll test. Not only was her attention held the first time we shared it, but every time since then, she giggles, swats at the pictures, grabs it from me, and waves it around. You might think that's just normal behavior for a baby of her age, but trust me, if the kid is bored, she's not shy about letting us know. I love the whimsy of the drawings and the wit of the poems. It's a fun book for any collection, and I'm happy to give it two groovy thumbs up (I was gonna say two peace signs, but that was predictable. You deserve better.).

Special thanks to Big Doodlehead

The Case For Delaying Solids

2011-08-31T15:23:00.000-07:00

A few days shy of her half-birthday (aka "Halfsie" - thanks Mama Lady KT!), I prepared Babydoll's first tiny bowl of rice cereal. That first feeding was captured in photos and video, as BD and I cracked up over Babydoll's reaction to the thin, bland cereal. In the days, weeks, and now months, that have followed that initial taste of solid food, I've encountered folks who want to know why we didn't give the baby rice cereal the very minute she turned four months old. From all the research I've conducted, I can't figure out why it's common practice these days to give a four-month-old baby solid foods. Some parents I know began even earlier than four months. It just doesn't make sense to me. There is so much evidence supporting a delay until six months old or later, or allowing the child to practice baby-led weaning.

My first stop on this research train was KellyMom. That website is a treasure trove of real, science-based information, and it's an amazing source of breastfeeding and natural parenting support. I next visited my old stand-by, Dr. Sears, for his take on the topic. Finally, I checked the American Academy of Pediatrics* and the World Health Organization* for the collective view of physicians. Every single source on my check-list supported my idea that my baby would tell me when she was ready and that waiting until she was older would be the most beneficial to her health. It had absolutely nothing to do with how much or how little she weighed, a common argument for those who begin feeding solids early.

Armed with my newfound knowledge, we marched into the baby's four-month pediatric check-up, prepared to battle the doctor when she told us to start giving the baby cereal. To my relief, our supportive doctor told us that she would prefer if we waited at least another six weeks to start solids. (I've since realized that our pediatrician is a closeted hippie parent, who practices bedsharing and delayed vaccinations for her own children, much to the dismay of the other doctors at the practice.)

The primary reasoning behind our decision to delay was this: a baby's intestines simply cannot process food other than breastmilk or formula before it has reached six months of age. Giving a baby food before this time often leads to food allergies, digestive problems (including painful gas, diarrhea and constipation), immune system deficiencies, iron-absorption issues, and obesity in later years.

My friend over at I Am Totally *That* Mom suggested that I look into baby-led weaning some months back. Since doing so, we've sort of followed that practice. I do make purees for Babydoll and spoon-feed her, but she often takes the spoon from my hand and allows me to help her guide it to her mouth. We also allow her to choose foods from our plates when it sparks her interest. She is still getting the hang of it, but she sure does love to make a mess of herself and her high chair (and the floor, and the dog's heads, and Mama's skirt). A friend of mine asked how we could tell that Babydoll was ready for solid foods. It was a pretty easy observation: she sat with us at the dinner table and began to take an interest in what we were doing, rather than just flinging her floppy bunny around and screeching at the kitty. She would follow our hands as we put food in our mouths, and she'd make chewing motions with her mouth. She began reaching for our utensils and our plates. This all began around the time that she was five months old. We knew that at her age, she wasn't truly ready for food, she simply wanted to be included in what the big people were doing. During meal times, we kept her involved by talking to her and giving her a cup or toy to play with. We gave it another month, then I bought a box of Earth's Best Organic Rice Cereal and fixed her a bowl.

So far, Babydoll has liked everything she's tasted (except squash, which is a shame. BD and I love squash, and we eat it often, so we'll keep trying). I believe that by delaying solids, we've allowed her to be more aware of the textures and flavors of what she's eating, which will hopefully make her an adventurous eater as she grows up. We haven't had a single issue of upset tummy or any other sign of digestive problems, and not a trace of food allergy so far. Knock wood.

Of course, there are always exceptions, and many parents make the argument "Well, I started Baby on solids at three-four-five months, and he's just fine," or "My mom gave me rice cereal when I was six weeks old and I'm just fine." Careful about making that argument to me. I can almost always find something wrong with you. Ha.

*American Academy of Pediatrics now recommends starting solid food with babies between 4-6 months old. The World Health Organization recommends breastfeeding for as long as possible, and exclusively until the child is six months old before beginning solid foods.

Crappy Parenting

2011-08-29T16:45:00.000-07:00

Crappy parenting (not to be confused with Parenting, Illustrated With Crappy Pictures) seems to be more and more prevalent in society. Every time I go out in public, I'm hit in the face by truly crappy parents (not literally, of course. Wouldn't that be an interesting post though?). You know these parents: they're the ones who let the (usually filthy) child cry, whine, scream, without attending to them, and then remark to a stranger (me) about how horrible their child is. They're the parents who post on Facebook about how their child kept them up all night crying and since the child didn't have a fever, they just let the child cry because obviously that kid was just being a brat. Right?

If you've followed this self-indulgent writing of mine for any length of time, you can probably guess how angry this sort of "parenting" makes me. I put parenting in quotes there, because my idea of parenting does not jive with letting your kiddo cry and cry without attempting to comfort them, or complaining to random people, within hearing distance of your child, about how terrible they are. Maybe I'm just a squishy-soft, overly attentive, gently disciplining, too-much-nurturing kind of mama, but you know what? My 8-month-old is one damn happy baby.

I ask this question far too often: Why do people have children if they don't want the responsibility of raising them? Why? It begins when you have unprotected sex - whether or not you get pregnant from that encounter (usually drunk - I find that's how most people get pregnant), you're taking the chance that in nine months or so, you'll have a little person to care for. If you make the decision to boink uncovered, and then you make the decision to have and keep the baby, you should make the decision to do your very best to raise a happy, healthy person.

You don't have to parent the way I do. I know lots of wonderful parents who don't babyraise the way we have chosen to, but they are still fantastic parents raising perfectly happy children. In fact, I know so many amazing parents, that when I come across a crappy one, it just throws me for a loop. I was absolutely thrilled to become a mama, so I can't imagine how someone can make mean comments about their children (even if they ARE behaving like little hellions, why make yourself look like an ass too?). Maybe your "brat" just needs a hug.

The Baby Bed Hog

2011-08-20T14:49:00.000-07:00

BD and I believe that families should sleep together. From the time Babydoll was three weeks old, she has slept securely between her Daddy and me. It's comfortable, it's safe, and, best of all, I wake up to her perfect little baby face every morning.

For centuries, families from all walks have slept together. In tribal communities, it ensured that the child was safe and protected from the elements and wild animals. In the early days of America, most homes were small and there was often only one or two bedrooms, which meant that in a family of five, someone was sharing a bed with more than one other person. In more recent America, bedsharing or co-sleeping has become taboo. Why? Why are we in such a rush to push our babies away from us? Bedsharing and co-sleeping facilitate longer breastfeeding, reduce the risk of SIDS, and keep working mothers and fathers attached to their babies.

SIDS: studies have shown that bedsharing and/or co-sleeping greatly reduce the risk of SIDS. How? Think about it. If your baby is asleep next to you, rather than down the hall in another room, you're much more aware of his breathing patterns. Additionally, the mother's breathing regulates the baby's own. In the early days of Babydoll's existence, she slept in the crook of my arm. One night, I tested this idea. If I took a deep breath, she immediately took a deep breath. If I took shorter, more shallow breaths, she did the same. Isn't that amazing?
Breastfeeding mothers that sleep with their child(ren) find it so much easier to feed in the middle of the night. As breastfeeding becomes more established, sometimes the mama and baby don't even fully wake when the baby needs to feed. Baby latches, nurses, then rolls away and falls back to sleep. This helps both mama and baby (and daddy, too) get more restful sleep, even when baby needs to feed during the night. This also helps mamas, especially working mamas, continue to breastfeed for a longer period of time, rather than having the baby wean or their milk supply diminish earlier than they'd like.
It helps with staying attached. As a working mother, I miss out on many hours with my sweet pea during the day. Those are precious hours, and I hate being away from home. But one must do what one must do. In addition to babywearing when I'm home, sleeping with my baby helps us gain more hours together, even if we're both zonked out. And hey, I'll take what I can get.
It's just natural for us. For both BD and me, it never even came up as a topic of discussion. We both feel that families should sleep together for as long as all parties want to do so. Once I had more or less recovered from my c-section and was able to sleep in my own bed again (the first three weeks were spent sleeping on the couch because it was so much easier to get up and down from it), we began bedsharing with our beautiful baby. Seven months later, we are still enjoying it.
You're more aware of your baby's sleeping patterns and any issues that come up during the night. When Babydoll is restless (as she often is), instead of allowing her to wake fully and call our attention, we are right there to cuddle, soothe and pacify her right back into sleep. When she is teething or doesn't feel well, we are right there to keep her comfortable and allow her more rest.

Bedsharing is when all members sleep in the same bed. Co-sleeping is when all members sleep in the same room, but not necessarily the same bed. The term "co-sleeping" is most often used though the person usually means "bedsharing." Either way, it's still families sleeping together and it's a beautiful thing.

*Safety should always be practiced when bedsharing and co-sleeping. Babies should not use a pillow, nor have a blanket pulled up to their chin. We keep Babydoll's blanket pulled up to her tummy. If either parent has been drinking, or taken any kind of drug (prescription or otherwise), baby shouldn't sleep in the same bed. We use a fan to keep air circulating throughout the room and to keep the temperature cool (which you should do even if baby sleeps in a crib). Please read Dr. Sears' recommendations for safe bedsharing and co-sleeping. Dr. Sears does not recommend that the baby sleep between the mother and father, but it's what works for us. Use your best judgment, as with everything.

**If you don't currently practice family bed, you're probably wondering how BD and I maintain our "adult" relationship when there's a baby tucked between us. Without getting graphic (I'm so not a kiss-and-tell kind of girl), I will say that it definitely hasn't suffered. There are plenty of rooms in the house, beside the bedroom. S-E-X does not have to be confined to a bed in a bedroom. That is all. Wink.

Pinchin' My Pennies

2011-08-10T16:48:00.000-07:00

In this day and age, it's really difficult to be a single-income family. Our family gets by on just my income, while BD stays home with Babydoll (in the voice of Chandler Bing: "Could we be more non-traditional?"). Some days I wonder how we manage to do it every month, and some months are certainly more challenging than others. It's usually on that one day a month when I sit down at the 'puter to pay the household bills, that I stare at the suddenly shrunken number in my checking account and ask myself: "What can we do to cut back and save more?"

The truth is, we live a fiscally conservative lifestyle. Our house is small ("the shack of the block" according to BD), which translates to a small mortgage, property taxes, and utilities. Both of our cars have been paid off for several years - they aren't fancy, but they run (knock wood). We don't take fancy vacations, or eat fancy dinners, or wear fancy clothes. We just ain't fancy folk. To us, it is far more important that our daughter be raised by her parents, and not by daycare. We are very fortunate that my income allows us to live as we do and that Babydoll is cared for by her daddy during the day while Mama is at work. Here are some ways we make our money stretch further, even in this crappy economy:

Meal planning and cooking at home. This is a big one; most people don't realize what kind of cash they're forking over weekly for fast food or dining out. We plan out our meals on a weekly basis, make a grocery list and stick to it when going shopping. We always have leftovers, which we freeze in lunch-sized portions. I bring my lunch to work every day, BD eats at home, and we always have a great variety of meals from which to choose. We have really minimized our food waste by doing so, and that savings adds up. Big time.

Cable/ satellite: examine your bill. How much are you really paying every month to watch TV? We have DISH Network, and after taking a hard look at what channels we paid for versus what we actually watched, I decided to drastically cut back. I saved us almost $50 a month and guess what? As involved parents, we don't have much time for TV watching anyway. Babydoll goes to bed about an hour or so before we do, so we just don't have the time. We also have a Netflix Instant subscription, which costs a whopping $7.99. BD watches "Hoarders" and old episodes of "The Addams Family." I watch documentaries and the occasional sappy chick-flick. A $600 annual savings makes sense in our case.

Cut out the disposable items. How much do you spend on paper plates, paper towels, plastic cups, paper napkins, plastic baggies, disposable diapers and wipes? A whole hell of a lot, I bet. If you switched to reusable items, you'd save yourself a ton of money and a ton (literally) of landfill waste. We use cloth napkins, cloth diapers and wipes, glass food storage containers. I cut up old t-shirts for cleaning rags and we use dish towels in the kitchen. If you have a baby, you are spending at least $20 a week in disposable diapers, right? You'd save your family so much money if you switched to cloth diapers, not to mention, they are a far healthier option for your sweet pea.

Practice conservation with your utilities:

If you are not actively using the running water, like when you brush your teeth or shave your legs, turn it off. Run only a full load in the dishwasher or washing machine. The most brilliant tip I've ever been given about conserving water was this: keep a bucket near your shower or tub. When you turn it on to warm up, place the bucket in there and collect the water you're not using. Use that water to hydrate your house plants and outdoor landscaping or garden. How genius is that?!?!?
Turn down your water heater. Line dry your laundry. You'll save $5 - $25 a month on your gas bill.
Use surge protectors for everything. Plug your TV, DVD player, Wii, etc. into one. When not in use, turn off the surge protector.
Unplug kitchen appliances and chargers when not in use. You'll extend the life of your appliances by doing so and lower your power bill.
Program your thermostat. Keep your home at one temperature. We keep the temp at 76 in the summer, 70 in the winter.

Review your insurance policies, especially your auto. Call your agent and tell them that you need to save X amount of money on your policy(ies) and make them work for your business. If they can't do anything for you, get quotes from other companies. I've been with my insurance company for almost ten years; I wasn't interested in switching companies, but I needed to save some money. I called them up, explained my situation and voila! $100 savings annually.

Skip expensive cleaning products, and switch to vinegar and baking soda. You really can use these two items to clean everything in your house (except wood - you still need lemon or orange oil for that). Vinegar can even replace your fabric softener.

Plan out your errands to maximize your gas mileage; in the summertime, run errands in the evening, when it's slightly cooler.

Here are some websites I visit regularly to help me stretch the family dollar even further:

The Frugal Baby

The Frugal Girls

Restaurants.com (they often run a 80% off sale, which means I get $25 worth of yummy for $2)

Eco-Baby Buys

Baby Half-Off

Baby Steals

Penny Pinching Grandma

Organic Food Coupons

Mambo Sprouts

Penny Pinching Diva

Groupon

One more thing. You will never save a cent if you don't budget. And keep budgeting. I am a non-CPA accountant, by trade, so I live in a world of budgets. I've never met a spreadsheet I wasn't able to make my bitch. Therefore, making a budget, reviewing it regularly, and sticking to it are easy for me. I know it's not necessarily an easy thing for some people to manage, but you have to do it. It's a grown-up thing. Check your local continuing education programs for a course. Or, if you're in my area and willing to make me brownies (with nuts, please), I'll be more than happy to show you how to get bossy with your money. It's YOUR money, YOU earned it. Make it work for you as hard as you work for it.

In My Bag Of Tricks

2011-08-02T14:35:00.000-07:00

I get asked a lot, "What do you use for ________________?"

Laundry Detergent: Charlie's Soap. Awesome. I started using it for my cloth diapers (after getting horrible build-up and a repelling problem with Planet Ultra); loved it so much, I switched all of our laundry to it. You use one little scoop for a full load, and I only use a half scoop for the diapers. It lasts forever.

Dairy Products: I'm lactose-intolerant. It sucks. No milk, butter, cream, or, worst of all, ice cream. I use organic almond milk for my coffee and cereal, and for baking. For "butter," I use Earth Balance Soy-Free spread. It's yummy and makes me happy. My tummy is okay with yogurt and frozen yogurt. I eat plain, non-fat Greek yogurt every day, usually with a little organic honey and granola.

Cleaning Products: no chemicals here. Except for dish soap, I use only white distilled vinegar and baking soda to clean. For an all-purpose cleaner, I mix equal parts vinegar and water in a spray bottle, with 20 drops of tea tree oil and 15 drops of lavender oil. For dish soap, we use Whole Foods 365 Mandarin-Ginger. It's the same formula as Seventh Generation's, but costs $1.00 less.

Cloth Diapers: besides Babydoll, this is my favorite topic! BD finally got on the CD train a few weeks ago. What made that previously unattainable event happen? GroVia hybrid diapers. He does often use the disposable inserts, but they contain much less SAP than regular disposables, and they're biodegradable. Woot! For a nighttime diaper, I use Rump-a-Rooz G2 one-size pocket diapers, stuffed with a Baby Kicks hemp insert, Hemp Babies insert, and the large Rump-a-Rooz microfiber insert. For daytime, Happy Heinys one-size pockets and bumGenius 4.0 one-size pockets remain in rotation, along with a couple of BumCheeks I picked up from BabySteals. I use cloth wipes from Under the Nile and GroVia, and I make a wipe solution of California Baby Diaper Area Wash and water in a small spray bottle. I just spray as needed and wipe her down.

Food Storage: Anchor Hocking and Kinetic Go Green glass storage containers. No need to worry about BPA leaching into our food, or stained and stinky plastic containers cluttering up my cupboards. I keep Babydoll's food in Green Sprouts containers.

Baby Food: except for her cereal and puffs, I make her food. It's simple, takes about ten minutes from start to finish, and it ensures that we know exactly whats's going into her little tummy. We use Earth's Best Rice Cereal and Oatmeal, and Happy Baby Puffs.

Baby Wash and Lotion: California Baby Calming Bodywash and Lotion. On the VERY rare occasion she gets diaper rash, a dab of their Calming Diaper Rash Cream. Actually...in the five months this kiddo's been in cloth, I think we've only had one occurrence of diaper rash. Yay cloth!

What else do you want to know? I'm a researching fool, and yes, I do research damn near everything that comes into our home. Obsessed? Me?

There's No Crying In Baseball...Or In My House

2011-07-25T15:39:00.000-07:00

Let me just put this out there - if your baby is crying and you don't pick him/her up, I will. A baby crying breaks my heart, and it kills me when parents don't attend to their crying child as soon as possible. Babydoll and I were in the store the other day, and I heard a baby crying. It kept crying (I mean, for several minutes, and it wasn't fussy-crying, it was crying-crying), so we stopped what we were doing and tried to track down that baby. Unfortunately, I couldn't find him, but if I had, I would have had a word or two with his/her parent. I generally try to stay out of others' parenting business, but I feel that strongly about leaving a baby to cry.

Children whine. Toddlers throw tantrums. Babies fuss. I know. I'm not necessarily talking about that. I mean crying. Crying has been a topic of discussion lately in my mommy group (have I mentioned how kick-ass my mommy group is?), as several of us have babies going through teething, growth spurts, general crankybuttness, at any given time. One of my mama friends is suffering from a severe lack of sleep, because her babe simply will not be soothed. BD and I are somewhat in that same canoe, with Babydoll's own sleep issues, so I shared with her as much information as I could (primarily from Dr. Sears and Peaceful Parenting). She and her husband were contemplating letting the baby cry it out. Let me assure you, this mama is pretty granola and definitely not the Ferber-type. I know that she is at her wit's end, and I don't blame her for grasping at any solution right now.

Crying It Out, a.k.a. CIO, is a method of sleep-training for babies, first made popular by Dr. Richard Ferber (though he never used that actual phrase in his book Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems). The idea behind CIO is that if the parent constantly soothes the child to sleep (via nursing, rocking, swaying, etc.), the child will never learn to soothe himself. So, upon first reading, that kind of makes sense, right? Here's the thing: almost all sleep-training methods involve letting the child cry for any amount of time. If you have a baby, or have been around them enough, you know that once they get going, there's some hardcore crying that goes on when they get upset. Now I'm going to break out a list of why we never, NEVER, let our sweetheart cry like that if we can help it:

1. Crying It Out causes brain damage. Yes, it does. Study after study has proven that long-term crying greatly affects a baby's developing brain.

2. Crying It Out causes stress in infants (duh). That stress hinders not only their brain development, but their physical and emotional development as well.

3. Crying It Out leads to depression. What's more sad than a bummed-out baby? A depressed baby is a detached baby. He will have a harder time accepting and giving affection as he grows older.

4. Crying It Out doesn't work the first time. The method has to be used over and over, meaning your baby cries, on his own, for multiple days and nights.

5. And finally, this is the most heartbreaking thing about CIO: the baby doesn't stop crying because he soothes himself. He stops crying because he gives up. His little brain processes that no one is coming for him, no one will soothe him, no one will meet his needs. For this reason alone, we do not allow Babydoll to cry it out. Ever. No matter how exhausted we are. We are her parents, her care is our most important task at any given time. She doesn't know that Mama has a meeting in the morning, or that Daddy doesn't feel well. She only knows that she needs something, and it's our job to provide her with what she needs. That could mean she's hungry and needs a bottle, her butt needs to be cleaned, her mouth hurts from those GD teeth, she's bored, or she just needs a cuddle.

Why do people have children if they don't want to raise them? Time and time again, I am struck with how little respect people have for their children. They aren't just kids; they're small people. How you raise them is how they will be as adults. I want my daughter to be loving and affectionate. I want her to know that her family adores her and cherishes her. I want her to be a strong, independent person. I want her to know that no matter what else is going on in our crazy world, she is our first priority, always. When Babydoll cries, it makes me cry. BD can't handle her crying either - he says it hurts him.

I don't know why people expect their babies, and even older children, to sleep through the night every night. I don't sleep through the night. I often wake up thirsty, or have to use the bathroom, or I get a twinge in my lower back, or I'm just flat-out uncomfortable. BD is a toss-and-turner. I often wake when he does just to make sure he's okay. Because I love him. Because I worry about his well-being. Why wouldn't I do the same for my beautiful baby?

There is a powerful post over at PhD In Parenting - CIO: 10 reasons why it is not for us. I referenced it in this blog, and I am constantly linking it to other parents who are having a hard time understanding why crying is so damaging. If you, or someone you know, is struggling with whether or not to let the baby cry it out, please check that link, and the others I've listed here, for 100 reasons why you just shouldn't. Please.

Vintage Parenting

2011-07-07T12:39:00.000-07:00

My family's new favorite pastime is mocking BD's and my parenting style. Every recent gathering has turned into a game of who can be the biggest jerk about cloth diapering, organic foods, babywearing, and co-sleeping. In true family fashion, if I show that it upsets me in any way, the teasing only gets worse. So like the proverbial duck, I just let it roll off my back (until I get home to my own pond, where I can be pissed all I want). I can bitch about it here, because not a one of them read my blog. Nor do they ask questions about why we parent the way we do - I wish they would, instead of passing judgement about how weird we are, and how we are obviously damaging our child with our hippie parenting ways.

A very dear, wise mama friend of mine pointed out to me that the way in which we parent was not so unconventional or weird many, many years ago. This is true. So in that line of thinking, I've decided to give our childrearing ways a new name: Vintage Parenting.

I tend to prefer the old, the antiquated, the vintage, in most aspects of my life, so why not my parenting? I hate modern medicine, modern furniture, modern cars. My dream is to live on a commune somewhere, with like-minded people who just want the world to be a nice, clean place for themselves and their babies.

I do love modern technology. I have a hard time remembering life before my iPhone...but you know, I bet after a week or so, I wouldn't miss it.

Another wise mama friend commented that many people are just out there breeding, popping out kids right and left, rarely recognizing that every child is a gift. For BD and me, we wanted our baby desperately, and the night she was born was truly the best night of our lives. After years of being told I could not get pregnant, that positive pregnancy test (okay, more like 6 positive pregnancy tests) was a comet, a shooting star, a long-time wish come true. From the time that I was little, every time I blew out a birthday candle, or threw a penny in a fountain, I wished for a baby girl of my own. My daughter is, without a doubt, my greatest and most cherished blessing. Why wouldn't I hold her close as often as possible? Why wouldn't I make certain that she had the best we could offer for her well-being? Why wouldn't I do the very best I could?

I know that I can't protect her from everything. I know I can get a touch obsessed about certain things. But I am passionate about my baby. I love her more than anything. Even chocolate.

I am my own StumbleUpon.

2011-06-28T13:40:00.000-07:00

One of my nephews is forever posting links on Facebook that he gets from StumbleUpon. I wish I had had the brilliance to make this website my own reality years ago - we'd be stinkin' rich right about now and the mortgage on our little home would be paid off. I am constantly getting lost in the Internets by clicking on one thing which leads to another and then another, and so on. It's usually other blogs that ensnare my curiosity and keep me clicking. For example, today I Googled "pad phet" because we are going to dinner with the folks tonight, and I don't know how to pronounce this dish. I want to order it and I hate sounding like a doof when ordering foreign food. "Phet" is pronounced "pet." But here's the order in which I stumbled around on my lunch hour:

Google "pad phet" ----->

Blazing Hot Wok ------>

City Mama ------>

Foodily -------->

Dash & Bella ------>

A Gay Marriage Etiquette Guide ------>

Fiat's New Convertible ------->

Gmail

I had to stop there - the lunch hour was over, and I felt I had sufficiently spent my allotment of wasted time on a Tuesday. FYI: the new Fiat is nowhere near as cool as the back-in-the-day Fiats. BD and I saw an old one on the road the other day (he knew exactly the year and model because he's a car-nerd like that) that was in pristine condition.

Yes, I'm aware this post is not one my usual "you need to know this stuff right now" blurbs. I've been busy at work and at home. Babydoll turns 6 months old today! And we are taking her on her first groovy road trip to a groovy beach for a long, hopefully groovy weekend tomorrow morning. Wish us luck.

Oh! I can tie in EWG's 2011 Sunscreen Guide to today's post. We use California Baby on the Babydoll, and Episencial on ourselves. Post-sun, we use an organic, pure Aloe Vera gelly (can't remember the brand off the top of my head, but it's made in California and sold at Whole Foods). Check your aloe before applying to your child (or yourself) - several drugstore brands contain parabens.

Okay, I gotta go. Hope everyone has a happy and safe Independence Day celebration!

The Great Vaccination Debate - Part Deux

2011-06-10T15:34:00.000-07:00

In case you missed my disclaimer in Part One, here's the deal: I'm not a doctor, or a scientist, or any kind of medical professional. Just a mama here. Please don't take my words to your kid's pediatrician without doing your own research. We made these decisions for our child, and our child alone.

In my last post, I wrote about how we skipped Hep B and vitamin K when our Babydoll was born. The on-call pediatrician who came to check out our daughter thought we were crazy, and though we were able to provide him all the research we'd done, he still looked at us like the crazy hippie folk we are. Whatever. This same doctor flounced into my room, reeking of cologne and attired in fashions generally seen on "Jersey Shore." He also adminished me for having the baby in my bed instead of her rolling plastic box, even though it was easily 65 degrees in that room and we were freezing. Guess why he didn't become our pediatrician.

Before Babydoll joined us outside the womb, I began reading. And reading. And reading some more. I read Dr. Sears' The Vaccine Book. At the urging of my boss (who gave me his copy), I also read Dr. Cave's What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Children's Vaccinations. I got more out of Dr. Cave's book, than I did Dr. Sears' (don't get me wrong. I am so down with Dr. Sears and all of his hippie childrearing ways). I won't paraphrase either book for you - I think you should read them for yourself. If you're looking for a book report, this ain't it.

I also pored over the information presented at Generation Rescue - and there's a TON of information over there. I checked the website for The Institute For Vaccine Safety (run by Johns Hopkins) to familiarize myself with each vaccine's marketed brand name.

I reviewed the CDC's recommended schedule of childhood vaccines, and that's when I discovered some interesting things:

1. They pump a whole lot of crap into babies when they are only 2 months old. 2-month-olds are shot up with seven diseases (eight, if Hep B is included) in one visit. My hormonal knocked-up self cried about that for a good hour. I still get the shakes when I think about all of those diseases having to be fought off by one very weak immune system. And at this tender age, a great many doctors, researchers, and scientists agree that the immune system is incapable of adequately responding to the vaccines in such a way that immunity begins to develop, so:

2. They repeat that business at 4 months old and 6 months old. The infant's immune system is still in development at this point, but is more advanced than at birth or two months old, and is more readily capable to fight off the diseases, which leads to immunity.

3. The rotovirus vaccine (brand name: Rotarix) is 100% bullshit, in my opinion. Rotovirus is the leading cause of diarrhea in children, from birth to five years old. If left untreated (meaning, you don't adequately hydrate your child), it can be fatal. The initial rotovirus vaccine was introduced in August 1998; it was pulled in November 1999. You know why? It caused a rare bowel obstruction in infants and was killing babies. In addition to killing babies, Congress launched an investigation into several members of the CDC's advisory committee who had recommended the vaccine. They found that some of the committee members owned stock in the pharmaceutical companies in question; some members owned patents on the vaccines; and specifically, Dr. Paul Offit owned a patent on that particular vaccine, and had recommended its addition to the CDC's schedule for childhood vaccinations. Thank you to Congressman Dan Burton for having the balls to question lobbyists and pharmaceutical companies! Finally, Groovy Mama has love for a Republican.

After months of research, speaking with our pediatrician, and searching our hearts, we decided to delay vaccinating our daughter until she was four months old. She gets one shot per month, and yes, we skipped Rotarix. We will also delay MMR - unless you live under a rock, you've probably heard that this vaccine is the one thought to be tied to autism. Experts go back and forth about this pretty much daily. We didn't base our decision about MMR on any of the autism hype - we are just following what feels right to us.

I asked on Facebook, if any of my friends or family had done a delayed or alternative vaccination schedule. Out of 25 answers, only one mother had (she happens to be a mom whose parenting style I identify with). Everyone else said pretty much the same thing: "Just follow the schedule! We did, and our kids are fine."

Well, okay. I'm not trying to change the world, I guess I just wanted to gauge how out there my ideas were. Another catalyst occurred when we took Babydoll to her one-week pediatrician appointment. While we were waiting, a mom came in with her 15-month-old daughter (I don't just magically know that - I overheard her say it). The mom told the receptionist that they were there for shots, to which the receptionist replied: "Which ones?" The mom looked at her blankly, and said "Um, I don't know. Don't you have it in her file?"

Whoa. Really? Seriously, lady? BD and I looked at each other, incredulously. This mom doesn't know what disease(s) is about to be injected into her daughter? She probably also doesn't know what side effects to look for in the aftermath. She probably doesn't know to give her daughter a little extra vitamin C and vitamin A in the days before the shot (immune boosters - helps the body fight better and ward off a fever). Poor kid. Her shoes were sparkly, though.

By the time Babydoll begins school, she will be current on all of her shots (except the aforementioned Rotarix, but they only get that twice in infancy). There are a couple other vaccines we will skip as well; we feel that they are unnecessary and we'd rather not subject our child to anything more than what we feel she needs. There are a lot of funky ingredients in today's vaccines - check out these potential side effects.

Another argument posited to us was: "Well, I got all my shots when I was a kid and I'm all good." Okay, so let's talk about how the schedule has drastically changed in 25 years, shall we?

In 1983 - children received a total of 10 vaccinations from age two until age six.

In 2008 - children received a total of 36 vaccinations from birth to age six.

Quite a substantial difference, wouldn't you agree? Check out this chart for yourself.

When it comes to your children, it is YOUR responsibility as their parent to make the best decisions for them until they are capable of making those decisions for themselves. It is my hope that all parents educate themselves about everything concerning their child, rather than blindly following the herd.

There is an abyss of information on this topic. There are thousands of books and studies written on the subject. And, as always, every doctor has her own opinion. The best parenting advice I've received is "Follow your heart and your gut." So that's what we've done, with this and with everything.

The Great Vaccination Debate - Part I

2011-05-24T22:14:00.000-07:00

Before I get started on this flaming hot topic, let me say I am not a doctor. I'm not a scientist, or a nurse, or a medical professional of any kind. I'm just a mama. The decisions BD and I have made are for OUR child, and no one else's. Got it?

I'm going to write this in two, maybe three, parts. There is a lot of ground to cover, and I could go on for days about the subject. There's a TON of research supporting both sides of the debate and I want to present it fairly and accurately. You'll see that I am very obviously biased on the subject, but I want to make it clear that none of the decisions we've made were done so lightly, or without grounds.

When Babydoll was born, BD and I had already made the decision that she would not receive a vitamin K shot, nor the Hepatitis B shot. Why? She didn't need them, in our opinion. Though we were questioned, together and separately, about it in the hospital, we (read: I) had done the research and our collective mind had been made up.

Newborns receive a shot of vitamin K at birth in order to prevent, or slow down, the very rare occurrence of bleeding in the brain. Breastfeeding mothers (as I intended to be) can increase their baby's vitamin K level naturally by upping their own dietary intake of vitamin K. Formula-fed babies receive high doses of vitamin K from enriched formula. Additionally, our decision was influenced by my genetically-inherited Factor V Leiden thrombophilia, a condition in which those afflicted have a greater risk of developing blood clots. With Babydoll having a 50/50 shot of inheriting the same disorder, no way in hell were we taking a chance.

The Hepatitis B vaccine is given to babies at birth in order to prevent (duh) Hepatitis B, a highly infectious disease. We decided against this because A:) I'm not infected, and therefore could not pass it on to my baby, and B:) we don't engage in the high-risk behaviors associated with Hepatitis B (sharing needles, unsafe sex with mulitple partners...yeah, we're boring), nor do we work in the health care industry, which does carry a slightly higher risk of infection. There is also some indication of a higher rate of SIDS in infants who have received the Hep B vaccine, as well as developmental neurological disorders. Those four factors, primarily, helped us make the decision to skip this innoculation.

We did agree to the use of erythromycin eye ointment, because, at the time, we thought I would be having a vaginal birth. Had we known I would be having a Caesarean section, we would have skipped this as well. Erythromycin, either in ointment or drop form, is used to prevent neonatal conjunctivitis, which occurs when bacteria, from the birth canal or post-birth handling, enters the newborn's eyes. There's actually not a lot of conclusive evidence supporting either side of this debate, but we figured we'd give this one the okay.

To be continued...

It's Not Just For Salad

2011-05-14T00:02:00.000-07:00

Vinegar, that is. When I first began exploring a greener existence, friends in the know schooled me on the art of cleaning with vinegar and baking soda. I've never looked back. Three things: cheap, effective, and non-toxic. What more do you need to know?

Plenty. I get it. You know how you go to Wal-Mart (and I wish you wouldn't, but that's your choice), and you spend somewhere in the neighborhood of $40 for all your cleaning products? I know, it's not often that you buy all of that stuff in one trip, but if you did, you'd spend about that much, whether you buy name-brand or store-brand. And then, in a few months, you have to buy more.

White distilled vinegar, on the other hand, will run you about $3.00 per gallon. A small box of Arm & Hammer baking soda is $1.00 (a four pound box is around $8.00). A gallon of vinegar lasts me six months, and the small box of baking soda gets me by for two months. There's the CHEAP.

Here's the EFFECTIVE: vinegar cleans glass and mirrors without streaks. You know what else? Vinegar is a natural disinfectant. Seriously. Baking soda serves as a scrub for toilets, tubs, counters, sinks...you name it, baking soda will scrub it clean. Combine the two, and you get an amazing powerhouse. Some examples:

Baked-on grease in the oven? Spray with vinegar, sprinkle with baking soda, and spray with vinegar again. It fizzes (which delights the five-year-old in me every time)! Let it set for about 15 minutes, then get in there with your sponge and wipe clean.
Gunky drain ("gunky" being a technical term)? Pour a 1/2 cup of baking soda down the drain, follow with about a 1/2 cup of vinegar, let fizz (tee hee!), then flush with hot water.
Scummy bathtub? Spray with full strength vinegar, sprinkle with baking soda. Let sit for a few minutes, then use a sponge dipped in vinegar to clean.
Mildew and mold? Spray with full strength vinegar and let set. The vinegar dissolves the mold and acts as a disinfectant.

And now for the NON-TOXIC: being pregnant meant I could no longer use Windex, 409, Chlorox Clean-Up...unless I didn't mind a potentially three-eyed baby. Everday household cleansers contain toxic ingredients, and you don't have to be pregnant to be afraid of them. You know how you spray your bathtub down with Tilex, then have to turn on the fan and/or open a window to air out the fumes? Do you want to breathe that in? Do you want your kids to be exposed to that? Why not just take them to a Vegas casino and plop them down by the slot machines for some good old-fashioned second hand smoke? I'm not being overzealous here. With vinegar and baking soda, you don't have those worries. They are 100% non-toxic (PSA: DO NOT combine vinegar with bleach. That is extremely toxic.)

For my everyday cleaning, I mix a solution of one part vinegar to two parts water, 20 drops of tea tree oil (another natural disinfectant) and 20 drops of lavender oil (a natural anti-fungal, plus it smells nice). I use this solution in a spray bottle, to wipe down my kitchen and bathroom counters, and for spot cleaning.

Care2 is an awesome, green-living website and they have a TON of ideas and uses for vinegar, baking soda, and plain ol' water. Check them out when you have time. You can also go to Arm & Hammer's website for a veritable cornucopia of baking soda uses.

So what I'm saying here, is that if you have children, you know just how quickly they go from being completely out cold to wide awake and demanding of attention the minute you start to clean something. If you're using vinegar and baking soda, you can drop your sponge and attend to your Precious immediately (no crying it out in this household). I love that I can effectively clean my home with minimal impact to my budget, and zero impact to our family's health and well-being. Thank you, vinegar. Thank you, baking soda. I owe you guys a Bundt cake.

Chomping At The Bit

2011-04-30T16:49:00.000-07:00

Guess who's teething? Yes, we have reached that milestone. It's not as cute as say, when she started smiling and cooing. No, definitely not as cute as that. My normally sweet and cheerful Babydoll is a miserable drooly mess of a baby. Some of my dear mommy friends have babies who are about the same age as my sweetness, so it's nice to have someone with whom we can weather this storm. And oh, what a storm it is. To put it mildly, Babydoll is *pissed* about her swollen gums. If she could speak, I'm pretty sure a nice chunk of expletives would be spewing forth right about now.

So, what's a Groovy Mama to do when her precious babe is in pain?

I suppose, in this day and age, we should forego our parents' remedy: rubbing whisky on the baby's gums. I believe this is why the smell of Jack Daniel's makes me gag uncontrollably.

BD and I are in the midst of exploring all the homeopathic routes. I wish that I had made a mad dash to every store in town when Hyland's announced their teething tablet recall and stocked up on those little gems. "But Groovy Mom! Those teething tablets were dangerous," you're gasping. Look, dude. Hyland's had been using the same formula for eons. Trust some jackass parent to overdose their kid and ruin it for the rest of us. Millions of people take tiny doses of belladonna with no side effects other than the herb's tendency to help you chill out. Grrrrr. So here's what we're trying, in lieu of Hyland's:

Amber teething necklace: while I was still pregnant, several green mamas recommended an amber teething necklace for when my little sweet pea began teething. The one I bought comes from Lithuania and is pure Baltic amber. For safety, each bead is hand knotted, so that if the strand does break, we only lose one bead. It has a screw-on safety clasp and is loose enough that it doesn't pose a choking hazard. At night, or for a long nap, I take it off Babydoll's neck and wrap it around her ankle. The theory behind amber is that it releases oils into the skin and is a natural anti-inflammatory. She's only been wearing it for two days but the drool factor has greatly decreased. I'm hopeful that it helps with the pain, too. Plus, she looks cute:

Chamomile: I've found several methods for using chamomile. My favorite, so far, is to brew a cup of chamomile tea (for me) and place the used tea bag in the freezer for about a half hour. Then, I let Babydoll gum on it (of course, I watch her carefully to make sure the tea bag doesn't open). You can also brew chamomile tea and soak a baby washcloth in it, then freeze, for the same effect. I've read that infants can safely ingest chamomile in small amounts, but I haven't bought Babydoll her own tea pot yet.

For older babies, who have started solids, you can freeze chunks of fruit then place it in a mesh teething bag for baby to gnaw on. Babydoll just recently turned four months old, so we're not rocking this method yet. (Before you buy, please check the label and make sure the product is BPA-free)

As a last resort, we've given her Infant's Tylenol. For myself, I try to avoid conventional medicine if at all possible, and in an ideal world, I would do the same for my child. I can't stand to see her in pain, though, and if all else fails, we give it to her.

Hey mamas, what natural teething rememdy has worked for you? Let me know!

All Day, Every Day

2011-04-22T19:00:00.000-07:00

Happy Earth Day! I love Earth Day. After Christmas and St. Patrick's Day, it's my favorite holiday (I also love that Hallmark hasn't ruined it the way they have every other holiday...yet). I try to live as though every day is Earth Day, but I know that's not the case for everyone. So I'm grateful that on this one day every year, more people are likely to recycle or otherwise reduce their consumption. We gotta start somewhere.

I am not, by any means, the greenest person out there. I am a full-fledged liberal hippie treehugger, but I could be greener. You're shocked. I can see it on your face. But really, there are a lot of things I don't do, but could do, to make my world a deeper shade of green. I could take public transportation, but I love my car (I do ride my bike when it's an option). I could reduce my food waste by composting (and it's something currently on my ever-expanding to-do list). I could threaten BD with leaving if he doesn't fully switch to cloth diapers...but I really don't want to leave. I love our house.

I'm always exploring ways to be a more ecologically responsible citizen. I love reading others' blogs (like this one) to gain insight and ideas on ways to green up my family even further. Here are some of the things we do in our (mostly) happy abode:

Recycle. Obviously. We're extremely fortunate to live in a neighborhood that participates in the local waste management company's pilot recycling program. Rather than sorting our recyclables, it all goes in one large bin that is collected every Saturday. It's awesome. This ease of use gets BD to recycle and nothing makes a Groovy Mama happier than when BD participates in the green life. Every scrap of paper, plastic, aluminum and glass goes in that bin. Before we bought our house, we lived in a condo with no recycling program. It took a lot of extra effort on my part, but any plastic or aluminum we discarded went to Whole Foods or Fresh & Easy, and I took glass and paper to my parents' house or my brother's. I get rather eco-angry when people tell me "Oh, I can't recycle. There's no bins in my neighborhood." Dude, make the effort. It's easy. Collect your recyclables in your reusable shopping bags, and when it's time to go buy groceries, take it with you. Easy.

Park it. How many minutes do you spend sitting in the drive-through, waiting for your coffee? Park your car, take a stroll, and bring your reusable mug inside to Saxbys (my preference over Starbucks). Your gas mileage will improve and the Earth will breathe a little easier.

Eat organic. Organic farming is better for all of the Earth's organisms. No chemicals are used in organic farming, which translates to fewer chemicals in the soil, the air, the water, and your food.

Cloth diaper your precious baby. I'm still new to the cloth diapering game, but I can't express how much I love it. I really love that I've reduced our disposable diaper consumption by a little over 50%. I don't know if BD will ever work with me on that. Every so often, I catch a glimmer of hope. Last week, he put Babydoll in cloth without any prompt from me. Then he went and bought more Seventh Generation disposables. Sigh.

Shut it down. When you're not using your laptop, turn it off. After your toaster has perfectly browned your Pop Tarts, unplug it. Not only will you save on your power bill, you'll extend the life of your appliances.

Stay hydrated while staying green. We bought an Energy Star rated refrigerator with a built-in water filter that only has to be changed once a year. Life changing! I drink a LOT of water, and after I kicked the plastic bottle habit, I bought a Pur pitcher (cheaper than Brita, just as effective). I hated throwing away those filters every couple of months, though. I still think the Pur pitcher is a better alternative to disposable plastic water bottles. Skip any plastic reusable bottles, please. Stainless steel and glass are safer options.

Clean your home the toxin-free way by using only vinegar and baking soda. Until you've tried this powerful combo, you have no idea how effective they are at cleaning EVERYTHING in your home. In addition to how awesomely clean your cottage will be, your wallet will be heftier too. White distilled vinegar and baking soda are CHEAP. So cheap. And did I mention effective?

These are just some of the many things I do on a daily basis, but it's just the tip of the (melting) iceberg. The thing about green living is that if you make a change here and there, and stick with it, you make a huge global impact. Reducing your carbon footprint is not just another clever and trendy advertising idea. When someone asks me "What do you do to be green?", it kind of stumps me. So much of what I do or practice is just part of my normal, everday existence. My advice is to make one change per week, or per month - stick with it and it becomes a habit. Your habits become your children's habits. What better way to influence your kids than by example?

I'd love to hear what you do to be green. Leave me a comment or send me an email.

A Baby Well-Preserved

2011-04-16T17:48:00.000-07:00

My friend Christine (who has an impossibly adorable 8-month-old daughter) asked me a couple weeks ago if I would look into jarred baby food. You betcha! Then I started thinking about that task, and it scared me. Not the research. Psshh. Me and research = BFF. What scared the piss out of me was that I KNEW I wasn't going to find anything good. It's like watching a horror movie and you know the bad guy is coming, but the stupid whiny girl who is about to get axed just stands around in the kitchen in her underwear...I digress.

So between work and home and being scared stupid, I haven't posted a new blog in a couple weeks. I tend to be an ostrich that way. If I don't want to deal with something, I stick my head in the sand and hope that when I pop up, whatever it is that I'm avoiding has gone on about its merry way. No such luck. Jarred baby food, consider thyself tackled.

From the beginning of gestation, there was no doubt that we would make Babydoll's food. We cook our food most nights, so why wouldn't we do the same for her? Having been schooled on the art of baby food-making by two awesome ladies (Hi J! Hi A!), I'm even more convinced that she will grow up eating organically as often as possible. After all, if I don't make her food myself, how am I going to know exactly what she's getting in her little belly?

*Here's a little tidbit not really related to this post, but I found it interesting all the same. The first baby formula was manufactured in 1867 and was marketed as superior to breast milk. Oh yeah, they started that nonsense a loooong time ago.

Daniel Gerber kicked things off in 1928 with strained peas, prunes, carrots and spinach in a can (not all in the same can - gross) and mass-marketed the product across America. Suddenly, mothers were able to pop into the market, buy six cans of baby food for $1, and save themselves hours in the kitchen. Prior to Gerber on the shelves, baby food was available from pharmacies and was (as you can imagine) expensive. Dorothy Hope Smith drew the iconic Gerber Baby, Ann Turner Cook, and a label was born. (Sidenote: Ms. Cook was cute and all, but she's no Babydoll. Just sayin'.)

Since then, the process has evolved greatly. Huge manufacturing plants turn out millions of jars of baby food a day. And, according to various sources, most baby food on the shelves of American grocery stores contain no artificial preservatives. Whew. Maybe the panty girl won't get axed.

Most jarred baby foods, even the organic brands, do contain natural preservatives, like ascorbic acid, which is essentially a form of vitamin C. That's not so bad. But some brands contain sodium and that's a no-no for babies and toddlers. Just check the sodium content before you buy or feed your baby from a jar. Babies under a year old need less than a gram of salt per day.

I feel relieved. I know a lot of mamas who feed their babies pre-made food and I worry almost as much about their babies, as I do my own. When Babydoll is ready for solids, I will make her food. I want to know exactly what she's getting. I'm extremely picky about produce. If I make her food, I know the quality she's getting. And by making her food at home, we can give her a greater variety of flavors.

Want some baby food recipes? I'm starting to experiment. Holler.

Organically Speaking

2011-03-25T17:58:00.000-07:00

***Cloth diaper status check: 2 weeks in. Cloth diapering rocks my world. Babydoll's butt has never looked cuter. BD still not on board...but coming around. I hope. Continue to send good vibes, friends.***

So, since I had put off writing about the wonders of vinegar and baking soda in order to write about disposable diapers, I was planning on covering that topic this week. Fate has intervened yet again, my friends. A random discussion in my Mommy Group (every Mommy needs a group, and mine is freakin' awesome) revealed this comment: "There isn't much difference in organic food, it's just pricier."

Whoa. My mission was clear: educate the masses (or, my 8 followers) about why organic foods are so much better for you and your family.

I've been making organic food choices for a few years now, and I've recently stepped up my game. Pretty much all the produce coming into our home now is organic, and we only eat organic eggs and chicken. You know by now about our meat choices, and when we eat pasta, it's organic whole wheat noodles on our plates.

In terms of food, here is the definition of "organic:" pertaining to, involving, or grown with fertilizers or pesticides of animal or vegetable origin, as distinguished from manufactured chemicals. And that's it in a nutshell. Organic simply means no chemicals, no hormones, no antibiotics, no funk. I'm going to abandon my favored list style and go with a myth/truth format today. You don't mind, right?

Myth: There's no difference between organic food and conventionally grown food. Can I stop right here for a second, and address that label? The irony in that phrase f'ing kills me. "Conventionally grown" now means that the food was grown or produced with the use of chemicals ("conventional," meaning widespread use or acceptance). 100 years ago, "conventional" meant...well, basically "organic."

Truth: There IS a difference. Pesticide residue on produce, in particular, is difficult to remove even with a good washing. Pesticide consumption, even in small amounts, has been shown to weaken immune systems ("Why is my kid ALWAYS sick?"), contribute to Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder ("Why is my kid ALWAYS bouncing off the walls?"), encourage malignant cell growth (that's cancer, dude), and inhibit the body's natural defense against cancer cells. Want more? Pesticide exposure, either inhaled or ingested, can be highly toxic to small children and pregnant women. Long-term exposure to pesticides can lead to nervous system disorders or failure. And that's kind of a big deal.

Myth: Organic food is expensive.

Truth: Well, I won't bullshit you. Organic food IS more expensive than conventionally grown food. But here's the thing: if you shop for produce that's in season, it's going to cost less than if you're trying to get strawberries in December. Organic pasta is cheap. Organic canned beans cost only $0.75 more than their non-organic counterparts. Organic dairy would require me to take out a loan, so for now we settle for milk with no artificial growth hormone, and when Babydoll comes of milk-drinking age, we'll make the switch for her (I don't drink milk - BD does). I went to Whole Foods today to do my weekly shopping and look at the prices I found in the produce section:

The bag of potatoes had a whole lot of them in there, and so did the $1.89 bag of onions. The $1.99 Fuji apples come 5 to a bag, which is perfect for me to pack in my lunch every day (of course I brown-bag it! You had to ask?). Whole Foods had organic strawberries at $5.99 a pound. That price drops in the summertime, when berries are in season, to about $2.99 a pound. Do you see what I'm getting at here?

Here are some other things to consider when you make the decision whether to purchase organic or not:

Organic farms have healthier workers. Think about it. Would you be down with poison exposure?
Organic is better for the environment. Fewer pesticides on the farms equal fewer pesticides in the air, water, and soil.
Organic crops are frequently rotated. This keeps soil healthy. Yep, soil can become unhealthy. Soil that is healthy produces food with more nutritional value. Seriously.
Organic farms are small farms. I'm all about supporting the little guy and saying "F off" to the big corporations. Organic farming is a much more concentrated effort than factory farms; it takes a lot more work to hand tend crops instead of doing a fly-by dusting of pesticides.
Organic is GMO-free. I encourage you to look into genetically modified food. Google "Monsanto."
Look for local Farmer's Markets. Often, you'll find fresh, organic, locally grown produce at a fraction of the cost you'd pay in a grocery store. And you support the little guy! I heart the little guy! Look, I live in the freakin' desert and we have Farmer's Markets (yes, that is plural).

I try to buy organically as often as possible. Here is a short list of what I *always* purchase organically:

Chicken and eggs
Berries (strawberries, blueberries, raspberries...all the berries!)
Apples
Potatoes
Peaches
Celery
Fresh herbs
Peppers (bell - all colors, jalapenos)
Greens (spinach, lettuce, kale, chard)
Carrots
Tomatoes

Basically, if I'm going to eat the skin of something, I make sure it's organic. Do your own research. The impact of pesticides on our bodies and the environment is monumental, yet they're out there, everywhere.

My No-Booby Baby

2011-03-18T19:04:00.000-07:00

When I was pregnant, I was positive that I was going to breastfeed my baby for at least a year, or whenever she decided she didn't want booby juice anymore. It never occurred to me that my body (and my baby) would have other plans. Babydoll and I seriously struggled with breastfeeding; I know most women do, in the beginning, but after cataloging the issues we had, I've come to the conclusion that feeding my baby the way I wanted just wasn't in the stars for us. I won't get into the details; it's way more personal than I'd like to share and, to be truthful, I've just now gotten to a point where I don't cry about it every day.

Well, scratch that. Excuse me for a moment.

OK. Dry eyes again.

So then, I was left with the question: "What do I feed her?" As I said, I never, not in a million years, thought that I wouldn't be able to produce nourishment for my child myself. I had no clue about infant formulas. I didn't know what was best, or safest, or most reliable. I didn't know how they were made, what additives were in them, or even all the brands available. "Formula" was as foreign a word as...well, some foreign word I don't know.

In the beginning, we gave her what we had on hand. Let me tell you, when you're pregnant or have just given birth, the major formula makers will hunt you down. I never signed up on anyone's mailing list, but multiple cans of Similac and Enfamil showed up on my doorstep. In our childbirth class, we were given a box of powdered formula and premade bottles. My OB's office offered me samples at every appointment. Every time I turned my big belly around, someone was thrusting formula at me. My plan was to donate it all to The Shade Tree, but the last trimester of my pregnancy was so eventful, I was never got around to it.

After a couple weeks of trial and error (Similac made her horribly constipated - BD literally had to birth her poops while she was screaming in pain. We're talking hard, marble-sized, pellet poops. God, I can't even think back to that. My poor baby. I also tried Baby's Only, an organic formula, but it made her puke look like cottage cheese. We figured that probably wasn't a good thing.), we finally settled into Enfamil Newborn. She threw it up the least and her poo went back to normal. She began gaining weight and became the picture of a healthy newborn. Then, after I looked into artificial growth hormones in milk, I started to wonder about the milk from which the formula is made. Milk not treated with rBST says so right on the label. I literally jumped off the couch and grabbed the tub of Enfamil. I read every word on the label. It didn't say anything about whether or not the milk was treated with rBST. "F-word," I thought to myself. I went online to Enfamil's website - no info there either. "Ohhhhh F WORD!!!"

I grabbed my trusty iPhone (my "boyfriend," according to BD) and called Enfamil's 800 number. A very nice man bullshitted me for a good ten minutes, while obviously struggling to find the answer to my question: "Is the milk in your formula treated with artificial growth hormone?" He finally admitted that he didn't know, and since I wasn't going anywhere without an answer, he transferred me to a "product specialist." The woman I spoke with was, again, very nice and asked how my baby was doing on the formula. "She's doing very well, thank you. But I just want to know if the milk in the formula has been treated or not, please." They must not get this question often, because it seemed to take her awhile and after a couple minutes, she found her script. She informed me that the FDA has ruled that artifical growth hormone is safe (which is why I don't trust the FDA). "Yes, I know they have, but that doesn't answer my question," I replied. She went on to say that no test can determine a difference between treated and non-treated milk. By then, I'd reached my acceptable level of bullshit (it's actually a pretty low level, but she was polite, so I didn't want to get all douchey on her and ruin her day). "Look. I know all of this. I could give you 20 reasons why you should never drink or eat dairy that's been treated, but I don't have that kind of time. I just want a yes or no answer."

So here's the answer: yes, "some" of the milk comes from cows that have been treated with rBST. By "some," I made the reasonable assumption that she meant 99.9999999% of the milk. And I came to find out that Similac and Good Start are made the same way (except Similac Organic).

My stomach turned. My heart pounded. My head throbbed. I looked down at my beautiful Babydoll, lying peacefully in my arms. As if I weren't suffering enough guilt in my breastfeeding failure, now it was clear that I had been feeding my baby something I wouldn't feed my enemy. Worst.Mother.Ever.

I jumped online and Googled "organic infant formula." Earth's Best kept coming up. Hey! I know that brand! I bundled up Babydoll and ran to Whole Foods. I grabbed a can of their milk-based formula. Recoiled a bit at the price tag. Ran home with the new, organic, PRICY formula and prayed it wouldn't make her sick. At her next feeding, we cautiously gave her the Earth's Best. Then we waited. She spit up a little bit, but no major puke fest like the other organic brand I had tried. For her next two bottles we gave her Enfamil, because we figured it would be easiest on her teeny tummy if we weaned her from it slowly. Over the next two days, we gave her more and more of the Earth's Best and dude, she did AWESOME with it. Poop was good, throw up factor was minimal, and painful gas wasn't an issue. She seemed to really like it, too. We had a winner!

Nothing will ever make me feel like I didn't totally fail my daughter because I couldn't successfully breastfeed her, but being able to give her an organic formula that agrees with her does ease my mind some. Now, if you'll excuse me, Babydoll is demanding a bottle of the best I can do.

Diapering The Landfills

2011-03-12T21:14:00.000-08:00

Hi, friends. I was going to write about cleaning with vinegar and baking soda this week, but one of my fellow mommies (Hi, Amber!) asked me to look into disposable diapers. The timing is actually perfect, because I am in the process of transitioning to cloth diapers for Babydoll. See? I really will research something if you just ask. (Another mommy friend asked me to research infant formulas, so that will be forthcoming in the very near future. Maybe two blogs in one week! How do I do it all???)

So, back when I was gestating Babydoll, I did look into cloth diapering her. Unfortunately, I got some bad information and in my worn-out, hormonal, physically and mentally inbalanced state, I didn't pursue it. I was also met with opposition from Babydoll's Daddy (hereafter referred to as "BD"), and at the time, it was much more important to me to fight with him over baby names, than what would cover our baby's butt. Picking my battles...whatever.

We are currently using Seventh Generation's disposable diapers. We've used them since birth. In my opinion (and you know I'm full of them), these diapers are the way to go if you're traveling the disposable route. They cost about the same as Pampers or Huggies, but have much fewer chemicals. They don't have those stupid, cutesy cartoon characters on them (which was incentive enough for me). They are chlorine-free, so they are a nice, soothing taupe color, rather than snowy white, and they're fragrance-free, so you don't get that "Grandma's Bathroom" scent like other brands" (Pampers, I'm addressing you). Also, these diapers just generally kicked ass (ha). No blow-outs, no leakage, no issues whatsoever.

So, if the diapers we're using are so freakin' awesome, why am I switching to cloth? Here's one of my infamous lists!

1. The ingredients in disposable diapers (including Seventh Generation's) are primarily petroleum-based, which is a non-renewable resource and a big environmental headache. Remember the Deepwater Horizon disaster (big-ass oil spill) in the Gulf of Mexico in 2010? They were drilling for petroleum, aka crude oil.

2. Some of the chemicals in disposable diapers are carcinogenic (cancer-causing), namely Dioxins, which is a side effect of the bleaching process used in most disposables. Dioxins are a bad, bad mofo. The EPA lists it amongst the "dirty dozen" of environmental pollutants. Do you want that kind of shite against your kiddo's skin? I don't.

3. All disposable diapers use Sodium Polyacrylate, which is a super-absorbent gel. Have you ever changed a baby and found little crystals on his/her butt? Those crystals are SAP that has leaked from the diaper. It's a chemical. Back in the 80's, a similar substance was linked to toxic shock syndrome (ladies, you know what that is, don't you?). Yikes, dude.

4. Environmentally, disposable diapers are a nightmare. The Real Diaper Association estimates that somewhere around 27 billion disposable diapers are used in the United States every year. They also estimate that 92% of those diapers end up in the landfills (hence the catchy title of this week's post). In addition to that, it's not really known how long it takes for a disposable to biodegrade, but they estimate somewhere between 250 and 500 years. That seems like an awfully long time to me (sarcasm is just another one of my attributes).

5. I can't speak for every parent, but I'm spending about $50 a month on disposables. If Babydoll isn't potty trained until, say, 2 1/2 years old (the national average), then I will have spent somewhere between $1500 and $2000 on diapers. By comparison, I can spend between $300 and $500 on cloth diapers that will last between now and when she uses the potty like a big girl (come on, Babydoll! Poop for Mama!). That savings is a down payment on a car, or a jump start to Babydoll's college fund (and since Berkeley will probably cost like a million dollars by the time she's ready to go, I think the fiscally smart thing to do is use the savings for a new car now. Right?).

By the way, Pampers' website crashed my computer. Twice. F you, Pampers. You and your DryMax can go to hell.

*Earth's Best also makes a more eco-friendly diaper (they use corn and wheat by-products to absorb moisture). We tried them, and they just didn't fit Babydoll well. Plus, we got a few leaks (probably because the fit was bad). They also use inks and dyes. No bueno.

I can't wait for my first order of cloth diapers to come (any day now)! BD is still hesitant about using them, but I think once he sees that the all-in-ones I ordered are as easy as disposables, he'll be cool with it. Send good vibes, friends. I really want this to work for our family.

As always, feel free to ask me anything (within reason).

This Season's Hottest Accessory: Your Baby

2011-03-03T22:30:00.000-08:00

I love wearing my Babydoll. What am I talking about, Willis, you ask? "Wearing" your baby means you shun the stroller or baby bucket in favor of carrying your baby against your body in a sling or wrap. I wear Babydoll when we're out shopping, or for a walk in the park, or around the house while I'm cleaning (whaaaat? Exposing the baby to toxic chemicals? No way, dude. Vinegar and baking soda. Next week. Stay tuned, pal.).

There is a plethora of benefits to wearing your baby. The main reason I wear Babydoll is because I treasure her so greatly, I want to be as close to her as possible, as often as possible. Wearing her against my body, she gets my body heat, can hear my heart beat, and gets the comfort of being cuddled with her mama, while leaving my hands free for things such as blogging. For a newborn, there is nothing more resemblant of the womb than babywearing. The natural rhythm she became accustomed to while in utero is mimicked when I wear her, which brings her comfort and security. Babywearing has been practiced for centuries; back in the day, before baby monitors and day care, mothers had to keep their babies close to ensure the baby's survival, while still being able to labor, either in the fields or in their homes. The solution? Wrap that baby to your body!

There are so many products available which enable you to remain in constant contact with your beautiful baby. Here's the lowdown:

1. Moby wrap. Very popular amongst the babywearing set. The Moby is one long piece of fabric, which is wrapped around the mother's upper body, and encloses the baby in a variety of holds. It's excellent for mamas who breastfeed. I have yet to master the Moby. Incidentally, you can make your own Moby for a fraction of the cost. See here.

2. Ring sling. My current favorite. This is a fully adjustable sling that can fit almost any body type. There are TONS of ways to wear your baby in a ring sling, from newborn to toddler. They are easily packable, in a diaper bag, purse, backpack, etc. I carry one in my car and keep one in the house. Loooooove the ring sling. By the way, it's totally easy to make your own! Unless you're me and can't sew for shit. In that case, make friends with someone who can. Always good to broaden your horizons, right? Especially when it works in your favor.

3. Pouch (or pocket) sling. My other favorite. Non-adjustable, but usually sized to fit your body. The pouch works in a similar way to the ring, although there are not as many holds that work in pouch. I love my pouch when Babydoll is sleeping; I can slip her into cradle hold and go about my business. Check out this cuteness when we went to lunch with my brother, sister-in-law and awesome nephew last weekend:

"No pictures, please. Contact my publicist."

4. Mei tai. I have no experience with this carrier, so I can't say much about it with any authority (a lot of what I say has no authority, but I bullshit pretty well). I know some mamas who absolutely love this kind of carrier; it's like an adjustable backpack that can be worn front or back.

5. Infant carrier. There's the super expensive Baby Bjorn, or the moderately expensive Ergo, or the somewhat reasonable Boba (which I just purchased at 70% off on Zulily. Woot! Mama loves a sale!), and a lot of other brands. This is a backpack style carrier; it's very comfortable for daddies who don't want to rock a sling or wrap (and Babydoll's Daddy is the reason I bought the Boba). This kind of carrier is best used for an infant who has established head control. Nothing worse than a bobble-head baby hanging off your chest.

I had this epiphany a few days ago: 9 months wasn't long enough, so I'll keep holding my daughter until she asks me to put her down. If that means I'm carrying around a 15 year old, I'm cool with it. I wonder what I'll wear to her prom?

My Meat Eats Grass

2011-02-25T18:08:00.000-08:00

I love meat. Oh, how I love meat. The worst thing about being pregnant (and for me, that was a looooong list) was having to eat beef well-done. Yuck. Even the best chef has trouble keeping a well-done steak tender. Don't tell the pregnancy police, but I ordered my meat medium when I was gestating Babydoll. I also ate Brie, lunch meat and drank coffee. Once, I had some spicy tuna roll. Shocking, I know. Before I go off on a tangent, let me get to the point of today's blog:

Grass-fed beef. Have you had it? It is beef at its finest. It is also expensive, and can be difficult to track down, especially if you live in a barren region like I do. The meat you buy at the grocery store is likely to come from factory farms. And guess what? Factory farms are bad news. Here's why (you know I love a list!):

1. Cows are herbivores. By nature, they eat grass. Animals raised in factory farms are fed an unnatural diet (soy, genetically modified grains), and sometimes their feed even contains garbage, candy, chicken by-product, and until 1997, by-products from other cows. Oh yeah, dude. I'm serious. How disgusting is that? Scientists are fairly certain that is how Bovine spongiform encephalopathy (aka Mad Cow Disease) came to be. Now that you're retching, allow me to continue.

2. If you've driven in the country, you've most likely passed by fields where cattle are strolling in the sunshine, grazing on grass, mooing contentedly. These are happy cows. The meat at your grocery store? It doesn't come from these cows. Cattle in factory farms are kept in confinement pens (Concentrated Animal Feeding Operations, or CAFOs). All the time. They don't graze. They don't roam. If the pen is outside, they might get some sunshine...if the cow on top of them falls down.

3. As you can imagine, animals confined this way are at greater risk of disease. Factory farmers combat this by adding antibiotics, hormones and steroids to their feed. Like rBST in your milk, those antibiotics, steroids and hormones end up in your meat. Ew. And when your body is exposed to a constant stream of antibiotics, it builds up a resistance. Resistance means that any antibiotics your doctor prescribes you may not work; resistance also causes bacteria to evolve into stronger and stronger strains.

4. Factory farm workers are often undocumented immigrants. The hazardous work environments present on factory farms go unreported because illegal workers think they have no employment rights. It's ironic, isn't it? Millions of Americans are against illegal immigration, but every cheeseburger you bite into supports it. In the words of my brother, "Check yourself, fool."

I could go into greater detail about the health hazards of factory meat, but Babydoll will be waking up soon, and I'd really rather get into the awesomeness of grass-fed beef. I'll keep it short and sweet:

1. Grass-fed beef is leaner. In fact, it generally contains about the same amount of fat as a boneless, skinless chicken breast. It also has fewer calories than grain-fed beef. Woot!

2. Conjugated Linoleic Acid (CLA) is amazing. It's been shown to help reduce cancer risks, among other benefits. The meat from grass-fed cattle has five times more CLA than grain-fed beef. Woot!

3. Vitamin E is a powerful antioxidant; it helps lower your risk of heart disease and cancer. Grass-fed beef is four times higher in vitamin E than grain-fed beef. Woot!

Now for the bummer: grass-fed meat is rarely available in a conventional grocery store. If you want to make the switch, or even just try it once, look for a Whole Foods in your area. Just a heads-up: be prepared to pay at least twice what you're used to paying for beef. It is completely worth it, I promise. Perhaps the cost will influence your family to go meatless once or twice a week (I'll write about that in the coming weeks). If you don't have a Whole Foods in your area, check out my new favorite website EatWild. It's a comprehensive list of pasture-based farms selling beef, pork, chicken, lamb, eggs and dairy either in your region or willing to ship to your door (I've found this be a cost-effective choice, if you have the freezer space).

*When you go to cook your super awesome grass-fed beef, make sure you cook it to about 10 degrees below your preferred temperature. I'm not sure why, and Babydoll is doing her "I'm awake, Mama!" cooing, so I can't Google it for you. I just know that I almost ruined a pair of very pricy filet mignon steaks on Valentine's Day by overcooking them. Our medium steaks turned out to be medium-well, even though my very accurate thermometer registered them at 135 degrees.

Got some meaty questions? Let me know.

rBGH...rBST...WTF?

2011-02-16T14:11:00.000-08:00

BD asked me this morning what was the difference between rBGH and rBST...uhhhhh. Hmmmm. I knew that GH stood for Growth Hormone, and that was the extent of my knowledge. I don't drink milk due to lactose intolerance, and I skip a lot of other dairy products, too (except cheese. Oh, the bliss of a good French Brie).

So I turned to my old friend, Google. What did we ever do before Google? I vaguely recall something called an encyclopedia. But you had to go to the library (remember those?), and find the right volume and OPEN a book. That's just too much work.

rBGH stands for recombinant Bovine Growth Hormone. rBST stands for recombinant Bovine Somatotropin. Both are a synthetic hormone (marketed as Posilac and originally manufactured by Monsanto, the most evil corporation in the history of the world) that is injected into dairy cows to increase their milk production. Obviously, more milk equals more profit for dairy farmers. So where's the harm in it?

Soooo glad you asked!

1. It's bad for the cows. Use of the synthetic hormone increases mastitis in dairy cows, decreases their fertility, and can cause foot problems, among a whole host of other disorders, but it only increases the cow's milk production by 10%. In Canada, use of rBST is banned because its use has been deemed cruel to animals. Canada, I heart you.

2. Cows that have mastitis secrete pus. Cows that have mastitis receive antibiotics to combat the infection. Both of those end up in the milk. Yes. Gross.

3. The synthetic hormone is made using a genetically engineered e. Coli. Yes, that e. Coli.

4. The countries belonging to the European Union prohibit meat and dairy containing rBST/rBGH. They also prohibit the import of all meat and dairy products from the United States. You know why? Because our FDA says rBGH/rBST is safe, and the EU doesn't trust the FDA (nor should they, but I'll write about that another time). Japan, Australia, and New Zealand have also banned the use of rBGH/rBST because their studies have shown that the impact on both the animals and on humans is highly damaging.

5. Humans who consume dairy and meat products containing rBGH/rBST have exhibited greater likelihood of developing breast, colon, and prostate cancers. Mmmmmm, cancer-milk. That same synthetic hormone blocks the body's natural early defenses against microscopic cancer cells.

6. Studies are beginning to show that children who drink rBGH/rBST milk begin puberty earlier than children who drink organic milk. We're talking as early as age 6. 6!!! That's first graders with breasts and acne. 50 years ago, children began puberty around the age of 13. 50 years ago, hormones weren't added to our food. See the connection?

You need to know what's in your food. You really need to know what's in your children's food. If you don't already regularly read labels when grocery shopping, you should start. Milk and other dairy products are just the tip of the iceberg. Major retailers, such as Wal-Mart, actually stopped carrying rBST/rBGH milk due to consumer demand. That's huge. But it doesn't stop with milk. Most cheese and butter made in the US contains the hormone-milk. Check.The.Label.

Oh, and when you do check the label, you might see this phrase: "The FDA has stated that no significant difference has been shown between milk from rBST-treated and untreated cows." Uh, FDA, please allow me to call bullshit on you. The reason why all dairy products manufactured without the hormone have this labeling? Because Monsanto, the most evil corporation in the history of the world, filed suit against Oakhurst Dairy of Maine, claiming that Oakhurst utilized "unfair business practices" when it labeled its milk as having no artificial growth hormone. As part of the settlement, Oakhurst, and all dairies, had to begin using the above statement on its packaging.

Yeah, dude.

So there is the answer to BD's question. Do you have anything you'd like me to research? Ask and you shall receive, my friend.

Hoppin' on the bloggin' bandwagon.

2011-02-13T15:28:00.000-08:00

Okay. I give. I'll start a blog.

I follow several blogs. Most of them are written by fellow parents, like Chiarore, Danoah, Bree, and (you must read this lady's blog) Pregnant Chicken. When I need ideas, advice, info, a laugh, I love reading others' blogs. So why not start my own?

BD and I gave birth (well, *I* gave birth. Nobody else gets credit for that slice of hell.) to our daughter, Babydoll, on December 28, 2010. Today, she is six weeks old. She is, of course, the most amazing child ever in the history of the world. Witness her cuteness and you'll agree.

See? How freakin' cute is that kid??? Her cute factor increases daily. She's also an awesome baby...sleeps a lot, eats well, smiles and coos, and is only occasionally fussy. But I digress.

So we've got this kid, and it occurred to me, while pregnant, that we've got to make the world a better place for her. The purpose of my bloggin' is to document my efforts to green up our household. Got any suggestions for me? Send me a note. By the way, I hate the phrase "Shoot me an email." I can't explain why I hate it, I just do. So I'll never use it, and if I hear it from you, you should duck and cover.

I'm gonna watch "Food, Inc." now. If you haven't seen it, Netflix it. Be prepared to change the way you eat, shop for groceries, view Corporate America, etc.